As some of you may know from my Twitter updates, I’ve been recently receiving emails intended for NY Governor candidate Carl Paladino.

The amount of email I’m receiving is rising each day, so I started responding in a horrible, sarcastic manner.  I will be posting these emails.

On Thu, Aug 26, 2010 at 8:28 AM, Robert Cull wrote:

Sir, I am currently receiving public assistance through no fault of my own. I am 61 years old and prior to this have never asked for any kind of aid.  I feel I am only getting back some of what I contributed for many many years.  I certainly do not need you or any of the other un-American tea partiers to tell me where I should live nor am I in need of any instructions as to “personal hygiene” thank you very much. Looking forward to your defeat, Robert cull

Dear Mr. Cull,

While you may not be in need of “personal hygiene” instructions, how do you feel about grammar lessons?  That paragraph was a mess.

Do you know about the Enter key?  It’s on the right side of your keyboard, above Shift, and under the backslash key - wait, if you don’t know what Enter is, you surely won’t know what a backslash is.

The sentence you had hoped would deliver an impactful, disgusted end to your email was ruined by your choice of punctuation - or lack thereof.

I too am looking forward to your defeat, Robert cull (with a lower-case “C”.)

C. Paladino

“I only want your vote if you know what a backslash is.”